As September gets closer, I’m starting to think seriously about bedtime again.
My son thrives on routines and knowing what comes next. During the summer, though, we loosen up a little. Bedtime gets later, mornings are slower, and some nights we simply enjoy being outside a little longer.
But now we have to lock back in.
Kindergarten means a new school, a new teacher, new expectations and a completely different daily rhythm. That already feels like a big adjustment for a five-year-old. I don’t want to add being exhausted to the list.
Why We’re Moving Bedtime Back to 8:00
During preschool, my son was still taking a midday nap. Kindergarten will be different, so I want to protect as much nighttime sleep as possible.
The American Academy of Sleep Medicine recommends that children ages 3–5 get 10–13 hours of sleep per 24 hours, including naps. For ages 6–12, the recommendation is 9–12 hours.
Our goal is simple: bedtime routine starts at 7:00 p.m., asleep around 8:00 p.m., and our day starts at 6:00 a.m.
That gives him about 10 hours of nighttime sleep while also giving us enough time in the evening that bedtime doesn’t have to feel rushed.
Our Wind-Down Actually Starts at 6:00
I’ve learned that bedtime goes much more smoothly when I don’t wait until 7:00 to suddenly announce, “Okay, time for bed!”
Around 6:00, I start changing the feeling of the house.
The bright overhead lights go off and I turn on our softer, warm yellow lamps. Everything just starts feeling a little quieter.
I also have Alexa reminders set up. At 7:00, Alexa tells us it’s almost time for bed, and at 7:30, we get another reminder that it’s time to get into bed.
These little cues have become habits over the years. Even when we’re on vacation, I notice him naturally beginning to slow down around the same time.
Apparently his internal bedtime clock takes vacations with us.
Our Simple Kindergarten Bedtime Routine
Our routine isn’t complicated, and I think that’s exactly why it works.
1. Bath or shower
He gets to choose depending on what he’s in the mood for that night.
A very serious decision when you’re five.
3. Read together
Right now, we read a devotional for boys before bed.
Daily Strength for Boys: 365 Daily Devotional
4. Talk about our day
This might be my favorite part.
I’ll ask what happened during his day, but sometimes I purposely get things wrong.
“Did you have a lemon for breakfast today?”
He’ll laugh and immediately correct me: “Nooo! I had strawberries!”
Then he starts telling me what actually happened.
Research on parent-child reminiscing suggests that the way parents talk with young children about past experiences can play a role in the development of autobiographical memory. For us, though, it doesn’t feel like an exercise. It’s just a quiet, silly way to reconnect at the end of the day.
5. Give thanks and pray
We talk about something we’re thankful for from that day and then pray together.
6. Finish with affirmations
Before he goes to sleep, I remind him of the things I want him to know about himself.
He is loved.
He is smart.
He is kind.
He is brave.
He can do hard things.
I know I can’t protect him from every moment of self-doubt as he grows, but I can make sure there is a strong voice at home constantly reminding him who he is.
Some Nights Need a Few Extra Minutes
Usually, we’re finished with everything around 7:30–7:45, and he is out like a light by 8:00.
But some nights bedtime stretches an extra five or ten minutes.
And that’s okay.
Sometimes there are feelings that need a little more time.
Maybe his best friend didn’t share a toy. Maybe something hurt his feelings. Maybe he had a bigger reaction than he wished he had.
Those are the nights when we cuddle a little longer and talk about what happened: How did it make you feel? What did you do? What could you try next time?
I’ve found that these conversations go much better after the big feelings have passed and he is calm enough to think about them.
Bedtime doesn’t need to run like a stopwatch.
When a Routine Becomes Comfort
After doing versions of this routine for the past few years, I’ve realized that routines aren’t only about getting children to do things on schedule.
They can become a source of comfort.
He knows what comes next. He knows bedtime means stories, talking, prayer, affirmations and—most importantly around here—serious cuddles.
As we get ready for kindergarten, I know there are going to be a lot of things I can’t control. I can’t control how the first day feels, who he sits next to or whether he misses me.
But I can give him a predictable place to land at the end of every day.
Some nights the dishes may have to wait another ten minutes.
They’ll still be there when I come back.
He won’t always be five.
The days can feel long, but the years really are short, and right now, I’m trying my best to soak in every minute.
That said, there are a few little things that have made our evenings easier or a little cozier:
- A warm bedside lamp or warm-toned bulb – I love being able to turn off the bright overhead lights and soften the whole room as we start winding down.
- Alexa or another smart speaker – Our 7:00 and 7:30 reminders mean I’m not constantly watching the clock or being the one announcing bedtime.
- A favorite bedtime devotional or book – We’re currently using Daily Strength for Boys: 365 Daily Devotional, but any book your child enjoys can become part of the routine.
- A kid-friendly clock or visual timer – Helpful for children who like knowing what comes next or are beginning to understand time.
- Fun, comfortable pajamas – Completely unnecessary, but picking out his pajamas is one of those tiny choices that makes bedtime feel like his routine too.
- A favorite stuffed animal or blanket – Because, again, cuddles are serious business in this household.
These are all nice-to-haves, not must-haves. If you’re starting a bedtime routine, start with the routine itself. You can always add the extras later.
Getting ready for kindergarten too? See our Back-to-School Morning & Evening Routine + Free Visual Checklist for the simple routines we’re practicing before the first day of school.